Early Morning Fog

Autumn fog rolls in thick at the lake when the warm water meets the chilly morning air. On one such morning, we ventured out in our boat. We had not drifted far from the dock before Rose Cottage was encased in fog. When I have a spiritual movement away from Love, even slightly, I feel just like the cottage looked that morning—lost in the fog.

A movement away from Love never feels good. It can cause us to feel mystified by our actions, uncertain about our calling, nervous about the future, pressured, or frustrated, which can agitate our spirits. In more serious situations, we can experience spiritual desolation, which means we feel a disconnect from the Holy Spirit. ‘Where are you, God?’

When I experience spiritual agitation or even a mild case of desolation, I begin discerning as St. Ignatius taught the practice. Out of the fourteen rules this great Saint recorded to assist us through these difficult times, several rules come into my mind as reminders and guides:

Rule five: “In time of desolation, one should never make any changes but should stand firm and constant in the resolutions and decisions by which one was guided the day before the desolation.”

Rule Six: Although we make no changes in our former decisions, we do make changes in ourselves, “for example, by more insistence on prayer and meditation, by much examination, and by doing penance in some suitable way.”

Rule Nine: There may be a good that comes from desolation. We ask ourselves, have I become spiritually lukewarm? Will I stay faithful to God in times of desolation or walk away in anger? Can I gain a deeper understanding that all peace, all consolation, is a gift and a grace for which I do not have power to sustain?

Rule Twelve: “It is characteristic of the enemy to weaken and turn to flight…when the person engaged in the spiritual life shows a bold front…If, on contrary, such a person begins to be afraid and lose courage in sustaining temptations, no wild beast on the face of the earth is as ferocious as the enemy of human nature.”

Rule Two: “…the characteristic of the good spirit is to give courage and strength, consolations, tears, inspirations and quiet, making things easy and removing all obstacles so that the person may move forward in doing good.”

I pray a lot throughout these challenging times and listen more – often spending time in the quiet of an adoration chapel, before the Blessed Sacrament.

It should be noted that the obstacles impeding our listening could be related to personal failings. Still, they could also be related to what we have accepted as normal in society or to a wound buried in the unconscious. God will reveal these things to us in prayer as we discern the wisdom of the Holy Spirit.

When lost in a fog of spiritual agitation, we can sometimes recognize a temptation to doubt God’s love or power. Fight against it. Doubt creates a weak spot in the armor of our faith. That old enemy waits in the fog, looking for a weak spot, such as doubt in God’s calling for us, our gifts and talents, our dear friends or loved ones, and God’s love.

Yet, when we trustingly cling to Jesus in times of confusion, He helps us become aware of a “weak spot” - such as doubt. This new awareness will come with an encouraging message from Christ: “Strengthen this area of your faith. I will help you.”

We moved through the fog that early morning, unable to see much except the outline of a fisherman -seemingly at peace - casting his line repeatedly. Witnessing the patient perseverance of that fisherman, a scriptural reminder echoed in my heart - one that I refer to when I have become spiritually agitated:

“Be of good cheer. I have overcome the world” (Jn 16:33).

In other words, trust God in all things. For, very soon, the Son will always burn away the fog.